When the dust settles, I have absolutely no doubt that Asheville will win the title of Garden & Gun Greatest Southern Town. Capitalizing on the March Madness bracket craze, they've put together one of their own, pitting small towns in the South against each other in a field of 32. I guess they couldn't find 64.

Why will Asheville win? No, not because we are indeed the greatest. But because if there's two things Asheville does well...it's craft beer and rallying behind some fictional title decided by online votes.

photo credit: VistNC.com

So let's go ahead and get it over with and claim another useless moniker. Out first "opponent"? Charlottesville, Virginia. Poor bastards. They never had a chance.